It may be time to find a new library

I really like our library. It's big and well-lit and has a huge children's area, with several computers with kids games, and reading area, and toys for toddlers, and even a little fake fireplace.

But I keep having weird experiences at the library. The freaky family hasn't made a reappearance, but today was almost as special.

When I arrived at the children's section of the library, there were at least a dozen children and several moms I know, seated in the armchairs placed there for adults the way armchairs are in women's clothing sections for men while their wives are shopping. The one I know best (I'll call her Happy) was seated at the one sofa, working at her laptop, her paperwork covering the other half of the sofa. All the seats were filled except for one on the far side of Happy, between the sofa and a man reading a paper. I assumed, since he was at least 40 feet from the entrance to the children's area, that he must be a dad.

I sat down with Sabine, who didn't show any interest in getting down and playing while Arabella went hunting for her one book quota. The man with the paper asked me is Sabine was 8 months old, and we started chatting, he was surprised that Sabine was nearly a year, but then saw her walking. He said how wonderful children are at this age, so honest and real. And then he said something about not having any children.

OK, dude, that is way beyond creepy, that you are hanging out in the children's area, chatting about children and ages and how wonderful they are when little, and you don't have kids?! The only reasonable conclusions I can draw from these facts are:

1. You are a child molester.


2. You are a creepy guy who thinks he can find "desperate housewives" in Indiana.


3. You are really brain damaged and don't realize how creepy you sound.

I keep trying to come up with some less funky explanation, but no ... I was really creeped out.

Before I could politely remove myself and my family from the vicinity he was telling me how white kids (this is a white guy) yell at him when he's walking down the street. This isn't helping.

Next time I am just going to sit my ass on the floor. I'm just going to knit and poke the weirdos with a knitting needle. I am done talking to people in the library.