Dad heads home

I dropped off my Dad at the airport this morning, and immediately got all weepy. Although he plans on returning before Christmas, I just missed him as soon as I drove away. Even though this entire trip I was exasperated. There is nothing we can talk about that he doesn't turn into a political editorial (gardening, weather or water = global warming hoax; gas prices, food prices = corn into Ethanol is bad; an ad for nurses = how illegal immigrants are ruining the health care system and socialized medicine is a terrible idea, etc). He never makes a comment about what I am doing except to criticize, to tell me how I should be doing it.

And that was instructive, since I find myself falling into that trap, both as a parent and a teacher, and I don't want to be that way. I want to focus on the positive, find my children's / students strengths, coax them to grow. So I am searching for ways to do that, both through reading and through introspection.

When Michael and I lived in San Diego I met a college ceramics professor named John Conrad. John has a PhD in glaze chemistry, and started the ceramics program at Mesa College back in 1966, before I was born. He built a lot of the equipment in the college studio from odds and ends, including a hydraulic extruder and a sander on a throwing wheel for grinding the bottoms of pots flat. He wrote books on ceramics back in the 60's, on glaze chemistry and art, when intelligent books on the art of ceramics were rare. Several older potters in California have confided in me that John's books were the best guidance they had back when they were students. Even now, "retired", John is still publishing books, running a tool manufacturing company, and teaching classes, besides making pots. I was never his student, but I wonder how my life might have been different if I had met John when I was 16 or 18 instead of 30. Would I have still chosen clay, and art, as a career? Would I have made the choices I have?

But the thing about John that has been the most instructive for me is that John never speaks ill of anyone. Never. No matter what kind of things they may have done or said. He is never anything but supportive of anyone. Even me.

I need to learn how to be more like John Conrad.

Other things:

1. I have resolved to return to a decent weight (for my height and build) before I turn 40, which is only 9 months from now. I was feeling pretty good about this altogether because the scale said I weighed only 13 pounds over my goal. But then last week Michael, who has been going to the gym and using their scale weekly, stepped on our home scale and announced it is 10 to 15 pounds off. Too light. Arg! I have 25-30 pounds to lose.

2. Knitting is going well, I am nearly finished with the second Victorian fingerless mitt, and the gigantic alpaca shrug is reaching completion for the first (and longest) stage.

3. Sabine is cruising now, and even walks a little bit while holding onto my hands. But she really gets around by crawling. She loves gnawing (toothlessly) on peach and per slices, and tried to grab my pizza last night. She may be ready for "real foods" before too long.

4. Arabella planted 2 avocado pits in the back yard, she is looking forward to having avocado trees. We haven't told her that they won't survive the freezes. She already misses her "Grumpy".